Sunday, July 1, 2012

"Don't Let Your Struggle Become Your Identity"

One of those meaningful postings found on a social networking site, sounds simple enough...

There are a swarm of reasons that make up one's identity, the persons closest to you, the  small details that shine from the pride you have made into your career and life's work, the imaginative ways you go about your day that serve as the charming personality markers that others around you recognize. When struggle becomes personally recognizable, that means it is something you truthfully wish to one day have resolution, and you don't want it taking up space in your public and private identity. You want someday to rejoice in the moment speaking in past tense, this too has past.

So what may be appropriate is to fearlessly put yourself in the opposite position from what has clearly not worked prior, taking one variable out of the equation. Finding a substitute would be displacing the struggle to another platform, that person that keeps changing diets to find the right one but ignoring the problem of food-gorging. The struggle is now your addiction, it's a matter of fearlessly taking that one variable and willingly identifying it as the source of the struggle, and you painfully desire it to be resolved.

So what would that one variable be? Maybe it is the fear of traversing into crowded rooms of unfamiliar people, maybe trying a new venture, letting go of secure understanding. For me, it starts with a strange and (some may see it as such) psychotic sensation that offputs many folks I have met throughout the years. My struggle is trusting others and the sincerity behind their actions. I have taken  too many times allowing others' deceit take over me, and now my identity is functional paranoia. At times I am authorizing my exploitation convinced under the sheer argument that trust is granted to those holding social position and status and not always by merit. My variable should be to gravitate toward those my intuition tells me otherwise, there is nothing wrong trusting my heart about matters unfolding. It may come to realization, where all that is needed is for me to articulate my feelings and brave the storm that may ensue.

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